Goodness...

God is Good.
Even when I don't see it.
Even when I don't feel it.
He is in control.
He is sovereign.

One of the many things He is impressing upon my heart as I continue to process Haiti....

My Flip Flops

I have had the same pair of Reefs for 5 years. I love these flip flops. I got them in Pismo, and they are the most comfortable flip flops I have ever owned. I have known that they were on their last leg, but couldn't not wear them. These flip flops have been with me to El Salvador 3 times and now Haiti for missions trips. They moved across the country with me to DC. They have been to the western carribean, mexico, belize...

I gave away my other 2 pair of flip flops (brown and black pair from old navy) on Monday morning, knowing that I was on my way home. One of the 2 straps on my right flip flop broke. I told the team we need to pray that my shoe makes it home....

Not 5 minutes later, my flip flop broke. Now, when they say that duct tape can fix anything, I now believe it. Two of my Haitian friends took my flip flop, a safety pin, and duct tape, and fixed my shoe! I couldn't believe it. They handed it to me right as I was getting into the truck to go to the airport.

Look at this contraption....

Priceless....

The Poor Among You....

I think I know why Jesus said that the poor will always be among you (or at least one of the reasons)...

As christ followers, we are to be generous with our brothers and sister in Christ who are in need.

And we are selfish people. Period.

If we kept only what we needed to live on in the US, and gave the rest away to those who really needed it, the body of Christ would be taken care of.

So maybe the poor would still be among us, but maybe those who know the Lord would not be fighting each day to survive.

Culture Shock in the USA

When I walked into the airport at ft lauterdale, I experienced culture shock. I'm not quite sure what to do with all that I saw, experienced, and learned in Haiti these past 5 days.

I wept on the plane ride from Pignon to Port Au Prince. My heart was breaking once again as I thought about the abject poverty most of the people in Haiti live in, and what I was on my way home too.

Jesus Christ lived out of his comfort zone for 33 years here on this earth. I live a comfortable life in Fresno. The people in Haiti kept thanking us for coming, for sacrificing our time and comfort, for encouraging them. The reality is, for me, I don't see it as a sacrifice, or that I have done anything special. I would give up electricity, a running/clean tiolet, being clean, any day if it meant glorifying God. The first day and a half was hard, being in a new place, different language...I experienced culture shcok really bad. But once friday came, and I had made friends, I felt right at home. I embraced the people, the culture, and even the language. I am going to miss Haitian food...it is so good, especially goat. :)

When I walked into an airport full of white people, an extremely clean airport, and then a plane full of white people, I wasn't quite sure what to do with myself...

I still don't know what to do with myself...

Technology in the Third World

One thing that always makes me laugh when I am in a third world/developing country...EVERYONE has a cell phone. No electricity, no landline, no washing machine/dryer, no dishwasher, but they all have cell phones. This makes me feel a little bit better about my cell phone addiction. :)

Easter in Haiti

I experienced my first cross cultural Easter experience, and it was one of the most blessed mornings I have ever had the privilege to be a part of. I woke up at 3:15 am to the sound of the choir practicing. The team got up, dressed, and got to the service right as it started at 4:15. I, however, laid in bed and listened to the beautiful choir singing. I got up, put on my dress, grabbed my hat (women cover their heads in church) and walked out of the house to see an extremely packed church. And when I say packed, I mean packed. There were about 1000 people present.

The pastors/churches in Pignon and the surrounding communities formed a pastoral alliance. I walked into a service that had 20 churches/pastors represented, all on stage, and 6 different choirs. These churches get together every Easter for a sunrise service, and they rotate which church it is at each year. We worshipped the Lord under the black of the sky. As they sang in creole, I sat back and soaked in the beauty of it all. The singing lasted until 6:15 am, and then a wonderful Easter message was given. I don't know what he said, but I do know he talked about the resurrection of Christ. It was a powerful message, full of the spirit.

The sun rose during the message, and all I could think about was when Mary Magdalene and the other women went to the tomb of Jesus, and he was not there. Then the angel spoke to them, it says in Matt 28:8 "so the women hurried away from the tomb, afraid yet filled with joy..." How amazing...to be the person who found that Christ had risen from the dead; He defeated sin and death.

We took communion together...2 different races, 2 different languages, bought by the same blood. At the end of the service, the choirs lined up on each side of the street, with the rest of the people behind them, and with the FanFa (band) playing, we walked down the streets of Pignon praising our Lord and Savior to the town square. People from the houses came out to see what was going on. I would love to know what these people were thinking as they watched this take place.

The people made a huge square around the town square, and continued to sing praises to our King. I looked around, took it all in, praised my lord and saviour, and let Him speak to my soul.

Singing in Creole

Every morning in Haiti, I am first woken up by a bell ringing at 4 am, and about an hour later there is a much sweeter sound that enters into the house. The people at the church in pignon get together to pray every morning at 5 am and they sing worship songs. Normally, any noise that wakes me up is annoying, but not this sound. I love hearing the people of God worshiping in their own language.
The Haitian people have beautiful voices. Each church has several choirs. At The Bridge the past couple of years, 2 guys from Haiti lived in Fresno and were a part of the choir at The Bridge, Gerbi (pronounced Jeby) and Walquis (pronounced Wakky). They took songs that they learned in English and translated them into Creole. The songs, in my opinion, sound more beautiful coming from the lips of the Haitians in Creole than in English.
The Lord has spoken deep into my soul the times this past week that I have been able to worship in English while they worship in Creole. This was my favorite part of the worship services when I was in El Salvador too. The Lord has continued to open my eyes to his beautiful creation in the Haitian people.

Church Services in Haiti

I have been to a church service everyday I have been in Haiti except saturday night. Church services in Haiti are not anything like services in the US. Worship lasts about an hour to an hour and a half, with many different groups singing, rotating, standing, sitting, reciting verses...and then the preaching, well there can be multiple preachers, and they go as long as they want. The longest service was just over 3 hours (and started at 4 am), and the shortest was just over 2 hours. The services have been wonderful and such a blessing, but when you are tired, and you don't understand the language, it can be hard to stay awake, trust me. So for all those people in the US who complain when the pastor goes over the "scheduled" time, go to another country, sit through their service, and you won't be complaining anymore. :)

Simplicity and Dependance

One of the most fascinating things that I rediscocer about myself when I am on a mission trip is how much I love simplicity. In america, there is always something to do or see...always a distraction. Power, influence, and money is what drives the average american person. As a Christian in the US, I am constantly fighting this trend internally. I know that I fall short in this area so much, as I desire to have the latest and greatest toy myself (i really do love technology).

The people of Haiti have nothing, yet they are some of the most joyful people I have ever encountered. They do not have the everyday distractions that we have. Granted, life is very different in Haiti. They have only had electricity for 2 years and it is only on about 3 hours every night, and 6 hours on sunday. On most days, they hope to be able to eat something, anything, by the end of the day. They fight to survive most days, and I am in america thriving. Getting a pair of used tennis shoes and older t-shirts, it is as if they had received a brand new car. They live on the grace of God daily.

I think that if Jesus were on this earth right now, he would commend the way the haitian Christians live and he would rebuke us Christians in the US for depending on the things in this world instead of the Lord. Their faith, joy, and dependence on the Lord is an example to me and the way that I should be living.

Gentleness

Every night as a team, we do a devotional. We are doing the fruits of the spirit. Tonight, Forest led the time. We turned off all the lights, except one flashlight, he turned on some music, and he read scripture about the Lord's gentleness. This was a wonderful time to stop and quiet ourselves before the Lord as we had an extremely busy day.

The scripture that spoke to me is Matt 11:28 where Jesus tells the people "come to me all who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest". I was able to stop, and hand over my burdens to the Lord, knowing that he will take care of me far better than I can. And since that time (about 2 hours ago), I have experienced the peace that surpasses all understanding.

Dirty

I rode in the back of a truck today from Pignon to San Raphael. This is a 10 mile drive, but takes about an hour (if we're lucky) to get there. I am always up for an adventure, and I had already rode in the back of the truck, so what harm could happen? Well, I wasn't planning on being behind the other truck, which was bigger and stirred up a lot of dust. I didn't care that I was getting extremely dirty, but my nostrils sure didn't like it. Just so you can see how dirty I got, here is a picture...like the dirt lines? :)

And the Verdict Is....

Culture shock has completely worn off, I now speak a little creol, I have made quite a few friends, the country is beautiful, I have been technology broken, and I have fallen in love with the people and country of Haiti. I am extremely sad to be leaving this place in a couple days....

In case you missed my face...

here is a picture of me in the street in front of the house with people in the background....enjoy :)

Heart Broken...

Not in the normal sense. But in the “Lord, what in the world do you want me to do with all of this information? Now that I have seen this extreme poverty, again, what do you want me to do?”

The first time my heart broke for the lost was before my senior year of high school at OGN (Operation Good News). When I went to El Salvador for the first time, my heart broke even more. I could see how beautiful, yet truly broken, these people were. My heart broke for the extreme poverty I saw in some situations.

And now again, my heart aches for these people. For those who do not know the Lord, and are living under these lies, I desire for them to know the truth. And for those both inside and outside the church, I sense the Lord showing us ways that we can help minister to a physical need which will lead to ministering to a spiritual need.

Hume in Haiti

Once I arrived in Haiti, we came back to the house, I ate some really good Haitian food, and then I took a short nap. I had been told that there was so much the Lord was doing, and so many possibilities in the ways we could partner with the people here, I was a little overwhelmed but extremely excited.

The first outing consisted of myself, Ericlee, Dorina, Meilani, Stacie, Forrest, and Pastor Peter, who is the director of Christian Friendship Ministry. We drove on an extremely bumpy road, passing pigs, goats, donkies carrying stuff, and lots of people, until we arrived at a field with a sheet metal gate. The field had sugarcane in it and belongs to Peter’s father. Right away, Peter came alive as he began to talk about coming to the field as a child and how sugar is produced. He showed us and told us about the process that sugarcane must go through and how there is a machine that he wants to purchase so those that have sugarcane can process it and sell it for an income.

Then he began sharing his vision for a Christian kids camp. He described it in so much detail, that in the middle of this sugarcane, I could actually see the camp , and the kids at the camp. The chapel would be at the center of the camp, a dorm for the girls on the right and a dorm for the boys on the left, soccer fields, basketball courts, cafeteria…you name it, he has thought of it. Kids in Haiti are not cared for in the summer months as their parents are off in a garden or field, doing an odd job, or if they are lucky enough to have a regular job. This would be a place where the kids could come for a week or two in the summer, hear from the word, and be loved on. There is not a place in Haiti like this.

It was wonderful to see him describe this camp. As he was looking at me telling me this information, he was also lost somewhere deep inside himself, where this dream lives. And for just a second, he let me become a part of that dream, and something came alive inside me.

Traveling to Haiti

Whenever I travel anywhere, especially by myself, there are multiple things that always happen. Now, mix that in with the fact that I was traveling for a missions trip, and it spells disaster. Satan will try every maneuver he possibly can to stop me. With that said, let me take you on the journey that I endured on March 18.

For those of you that know me, I mean really know me, you know that I very much dislike packing. This is mainly because I can’t decide what to take. For a mission trip, my problem goes away…especially for this trip. I took 2 skirts, 3 shirts, a dress, flip flops, and a pair of tennis shoes. I was all ready to go Tuesday morning. For some reason, I decided that I should check my flight online around 3:30 pm. I couldn’t find my flight online, so I called the person who booked our tickets. I was to wait for a phone call back…which I received about 4:40. Apparently, American Airlines decided to cancel the flight that I was on from Fresno to LA, and then cancelled the rest of my flights and rescheduled it for the next day. So I rushed to the airport and arrived just in time to get on the 5:30 flight to LA. If I had been a minute later arriving to the airport, I would not have made it to LA. I am still trying to figure out when they were actually going to tell me that my flight was changed.

Off to LA I went, with no other problems (like that wasn’t enough to give me a heart attack, right?). My time in LAX was uneventful, which was really nice. I got to talk to a couple of people that I knew I would be missing (even though I will only be gone for 6 days) and off to Miami I went at 9:15 pm. There were multiple things that I would have rather not experienced on that flight (see blog below), but it ended up being ok. Even though I was exhausted, I knew that I wouldn’t be able to sleep on my own. It was a mixture of excitement and uncomfortableness. I had bought the travel packets of Advil pm. Since it said only take 2 if you have time for a full night’s sleep, I figured taking one would be ok…

I ended up sleeping for about 2 and a half hours, which was better than nothing. I arrived in Miami at 5 am (2 am for those on the west coast) and boarded the next plane at 6:30 am.
Once I got on the plane, we were informed that there was a mechanical problem, they were checking it out, but they were not sure what the problem was. That is always a comforting statement. By this time, I expected nothing less. I am not sure how long we were sitting before we took off. I was falling in and out of sleep, all the while there was a guy sitting next to me who wanted to talk. The flight to Port Au Prince was uneventful. The guy, Louievinson, kept talking to me, and I genuinely wanted to talk and listen, but I couldn’t keep my eyes open. The flight was relatively short (compared to my cross country trek) and I was pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t as hot and humid as I thought it was going to be.

Once I arrived in Port Au Prince, I was to follow Mom’s (Chris Karlyn) instructions explicitly. I had memorized exactly what I was supposed to do. Go through customs. Check. Pick up bags. Check. Don’t let anybody help me, all they want is money. Check. Find Nadar, who will be holding a sign with my name on it. Ch…Nope, no Nadar. I ended up leaving my bags in the airport to take a better look at ALL of the people who were out there. One guy asked if he could take me to the smaller airport, and I said I was supposed to wait for Nadar. He told me that was his brother…like I was really going to believe him? I told him no thanks, and went back inside the airport. This is when I went into a little bit of a panic. I had a number for a person in Haiti, but couldn’t remember the international code (which is 001 in case you were wondering). I called home while trying to figure out the code, probably freaked my mom out, since right after she answered, the person who was “Nadar’s brother” asked if my name was Stephanie. I got off the phone immediately. I knew this guy was legit since I never told him my name. I talked to Nadar on the phone, and he was to be there in 5 minutes. Find Nadar. Check.

Nadar took me to the smaller airport where I was to go to Tropical Airways and find Phillip. I arrived at the small airport at 9 am. Chris had set up a flight for me, and I had cash to give him. Was Phillip there? You guessed it…nope. I argued with the girls for about an hour on what I was told and how the arrangement was set up. At this point, I was about ready to give up. Satan was trying really hard to keep me from getting to Haiti. I am not much of a crier, but I was about ready to ball. This was a combination of exhaustion and I was done. Nadar ended up coming back to help straighten it out. He had a number to reach Chris on. Let’s just say Chris set them straight…or so I thought.

I paid them the amount that Chris told me to, but then they made me sign something saying that I would pay the difference when I returned, which was not what Chris told me. I signed the paper. At this point, all I wanted to do was to get to Pignon, no matter how that had to happen. I was at this tiny airport from 9-12:30, it was hot, annoyingly loud, and by this point, I REALLY couldn’t keep my eyes open. Since I was the only white person around, I was stared out, which I really don’t mind. They probably thought I was crazy since I kept falling asleep, my head would drop, and then I would pop up.

I got on the plane at 12:30. Phillip arrived right before we left, and told me the girls at the counter were mistaken. The amount that I had given them was correct, and he apologized for their behavior. I was just glad that we only had to pay the amount that we had planned for. This was a 19 passenger propeller plane. I don’t get sick in cars, on boats, or on planes…or so I thought. At first, it was exciting, similar to a roller coaster ride. About 10 minutes into the 25 minute flight, I began praying that I would not get sick. Before I knew it, the pilot was landing on a field, and I saw the rest of the team waiting for me. I could not have been happier to see some familiar faces and to be on the ground.

I haven’t decided how much of this I am going to tell my mother. Since she worries about me and the crazy adventures that I go on, I think this might perpetuate the worrying. One thing that neither she nor I can deny, is that although something always happens when I travel, the Lord always protects, always provides, and is always in control.

Short Lesson on Haiti

Since I am going to be blogging on Haiti, I thought I would give you all a short lesson on Haiti.

Haiti is located on the island of Hispaniola. It inhabits 1/3 of the island and is next to the Dominican Republic. Haiti is slightly smaller than Maryland. It is in the Carribean, just southeast of Cuba. There are over 8.5 million people who live in Haiti. Pignon, which is the city that we are in, has about 35,000 people.

At one time, it was the wealthiest in the Carribean. Haiti became independent from France in 1804. Haiti became the first black republic to declare it’s independence. Haiti is now the poorest country in the western hemisphere as it has been plagued by political violence for most of its history. 80% of the people in Haiti live under the poverty line and 54% live in abject poverty. More than 2/3 of the labor force do not have jobs, because there aren’t jobs. One may do odd jobs to earn some money, but does not hold a regular job.

Some of the current environmental issues are extensive deforestation, soil erosion, and inadequate supplies of potable water. Trees are being cut down for agriculture and also for fuel.
The average life expectancy is 57 years old. French is the official language, but most speak Creole. 95% of the population is black, 5% is mulatto and white.

The agricultural products that they have in Haiti are coffee, mangoes, sugarcane, rice, corn, sorghum and wood. The industries in Haiti are sugar refining, flour milling, textiles, cement, and light assembly based on imported parts.

Haiti was dedicated to Satan over 100 years ago by the leader of the country. Roughly half of the population practices voodoo.

My heart is for wholistic ministry: ministering to the whole person, the physical, the spiritual, the mental, the emotional. Before I arrived here, and I read up on Haiti on the plane, I felt the Lord telling me that there would be an opportunity to minister in such a way. I was pleasantly surprised that on my first day, the Lord confirmed this thought.

Surrendering my rights while in Haiti...and beyond

As a team, we signed a team covenant (I actually didn't, but they know I'm down). The first part of the covenant reads as followed:

On my mission trip, I surrender my rights to....
1. Quality of sleep on a comfortable bed
2.A private and clead toilet
3. Familiair Food and what I normally eat
4. Comfortable settings-humidity, bug bites, loud sounds, and terrible smells
5. Light when I need it.
6 Being on time and making sure others are on time.
7. My free time.
8. Understanding the culture and language
9. Being in control

Personally, I love number 6, since I have become apt to not being places on time.

But I experienced my first uncomfortableness on the airplane. I was in the very last row, next to the tiolets (which smelled pretty bad), there seemed to always be a line,I was next to the window, the crew was right behind me and they talked the whole time...did I mention I was 3 people in, next to the window?

Right away, I began to think and pray over this trip and what I was already experiencing. I had the mentality that since I wasn't actually in Haiti, I shouldn't be experiencing any "uncomfortableness".

I had a discussion with a friend a couple months ago. She has been to Africa and has used some pretty nasty toilets (or holes). We were at a park, and she wouldn't use the restroom. I questioned her on this, and she said she expects better conditions in America. She thought it was gross. This led into a whole slew of discussion. Needless to say, I have used some pretty disgusting tiolets in El Salvador, and I didn't care if the toilet was gross in Fresno...when you gotta go, you gotta go.

This thought process led me to the conclusion: As Americans, we think we deserve to be catered too and that we should never be uncomfortable.

Funny...I'm pretty sure Jesus Christ gave up everything that He had in heaven, so that we may know the Father. All that was comfortable, He left.

It is my prayer that I throw off my selfishness and remember all that Christ has done for me, as I go to serve Him, serve my team, and serve the Haitians this week and beyond.

Psalm 78....A Cat and Mouse Game

I went to Starbucks yesterday morning to do what I haven't had time to do in a long time (at least at Starbucks)....listen to worship music on my ipod, read my bible, and journal. I love to go to Starbucks and zone out from the world and do this.

I have been reading the Psalms recently. Yesterday, I read Psalm 78. It is a maskil, or instruction, of Asaph. Asaph wants God's people, the Israelites, to remember what the Lord had done. As I was reading it, I couldn't help but see the relationship between the Lord and the Israelites as a cat and mouse game.

They asked, He gave, they complained, He took away, they continued to sin, He slew them, they eagerly sought Him (for the wrong reasons), and then He was merciful and forgave them.

The Lord wanted to give to them, and bless them, but all they did was doubt, they forgot what He had done for them, they complained....

And how true this is for me and God's people today.....

I desire to seek and follow God with all of my heart, to do his will, to glorify Him....

I ask, He gives, I complain, He takes away or rebukes, I don't understand why and struggle...I do wrong but want to do right, so I seek him with all of my heart, and He shows His mercy on me.

I know I complain, I doubt, I don't trust....and I forget what the Lord has done for me....
And He has done so much for me.

I sat back and reflected on what He has done for me; the good, the bad, the hard, and the times I was content in where I was at. I was in awe as I thought about how the creator of the universe cares about every detail of my life...how he has a plan for my life and orchestrates everything in such a way to bring me to the place I need to be at just the right time.

My question to you is: What has the Lord done for you lately?

Spring Time

There is something about this time of year that I just can't describe....

It does something to my soul...
like I have been asleep for the past 4 months and am finally waking up...

I love being able to sit outside at lunch and feel the warmth of the sun on my skin...

Life is good right now...really good, and it seems to just be getting better.

Just as the flowers are beginning to bloom, there seems to be something that is coming alive within me as well.

Jesus is being gracious enough to revel some things to me, and I feel like I am blooming so to speak. And as I come to these revelations, the Lord is carrying my burdens, and guiding me along the way.

I love spring time...

Integrity

Synonyms for Integrity: candor, forthrightness, goodness, honestness, honesty, incorruptibility, incorruption, principle, probity, purity, rectitude, righteousness, sincerity, straightforwardness, uprightness, virtue

I am a big advocate that if you say something, you better follow through with it. Actions always speak louder than words. I place a high value on this. I don't need you to tell me something if you don't really mean it, why would I want that? Why would anybody want that?

As a follower of Christ, I hold this standard even more so with my brothers and sisters in Christ. There is always room for grace in this, but I don't want you blowing smoke up my butt to make you feel better.

I hold this true for those that I am closest with. If they are told something by someone, and then the actions don't match up, it pisses me off a little bit. Ok, it pisses me off a lot.

What really makes me mad is when I am called on something (which I am ok with, it always sucks, but is good in the end), but when I call that person on the same thing (or in the same type of context), all of a sudden it is a different story. Since I care about this person, I don't want them to be hurt. There is somebody in this persons life (a third party) who has said one thing, and their actions are not matching up, and now I am pissed. I called out the actions of the third party, and excuses are made.

The third party, in my opinion, just lost a bunch of character points. I see a glimpse of the type of integrity they really have.

I know, totally vague.

Words come up empty so many times. If you don't really mean it, then don't say it. As it says in James 3:5 "the tongue is such a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts"

Alone

The last three days (ok, 2 1/2 days) I spent alone in Santa Cruz. My family has a house there, and I hardly ever go. I took this week off of work to recuperate from Missions Month. Now, I love to be with people. I would rather hang out with somebody, anybody (well, almost anybody) than be alone. I remember being little and being bored out of my mind once my sister went to school and I was home all alone to play by myself. My mom would tell me to entertain myself...which lasted about 5 minutes. I tried to get all of my close friends to ditch work to come with me, but nobody was able to take off...some did try, but to no avail.

So I did what I never thought I would do....

I went by myself.

And it was the best thing I could have ever done for myself at this exact point in time.

I have not been this relaxed in, oh, over two months. Realistically, I haven't been this relaxed in a very long time.

I had nobody to worry about but me. I did what I wanted when I wanted to do it.

List of what I did these past few days:
-Took a nap
-Watched The Office
-Saw Vantage Point
-Sat in front of the ocean, listened to my ipod, read my bible, and journaled for about 3 hours
-Laid out on the beach and read a magazine
-Walked around downtown Santa Cruz
-Walked around Capitola
-Ate some great pizza and even better sea food
-Sat in front of the ocean again...ate breakfast and journaled
-Drove along the coastline
-Watched more of The Office
-Slept...a lot
-Ate ice cream!
-Walked along the wharf

All in all a very relaxing time. It was time that I needed to recharge and refresh. I have a feeling this is something that I am going to do more often. How often...I'm not sure. But knowing how rested and good I feel, I would love to be able to do this every 3 months.

Darfur Documentary

I am watching a documentary on the situation in Darfur. It is called "Devil Came on Horseback". Only one word can describe the atrocities that are going on in Darfur:

Genocide.

The Arab government of Sudan has trained and given money to the Janjaweed (when translated means "devil on horseback) to attack and kill black Africans, many who are Christian. There was a civil war that lasted for many years that was largely based on religion. This current conflict is more about ethnicity than religion. The fighting is taking place between the Sudanese government and Janjaweed (Arab) and the Sudanese Liberation Movement and the Justice and Equality Movement (non-Arab).

The Janjaweed will go into villages in Darfur and do horrible things to those who are not Arab. There have been thousands upon thousands of people killed, and even more people displaced.

The sad thing is that we see it is happening, but it is largely being ignored like the atrocities in Rwanda 14 years ago. Our own President said that the US would take a stand...but months after he made this statement...nothing. The UN is suppose to be getting involved...but when?

How many thousands of people must be killed before we do anything about it?

How is it that our country is so focused on what is happening inside our own country, that we hardly look at what is happening in other places, unless it directly effects us?

I don't have all the answers, or know everything that is going on, but I want to know. I think it is important and healthy to know what is happening in the world.

For more information on what is going on in Darfur, visit Save Darfur or go to the BBC.

Besides having the knowledge of what is going on, and not being ignorant...the next step is to pray.

Vaccinations=Sucky

I thought vaccinations were suppose to keep you from getting sick, not make you sick. Apparently I am the exception to the rule (but let's face it, I usually am).

I am going to Haiti in the middle of March, and going to such a place requires vaccinations. Now, I have already had the Hep A vaccination, got that when I went to El Sal the first time. I knew that there would be other shots that I needed. So, I did what I have avoided for 10 months....I called Kaiser.

I have heard horror stories about Kaiser, and have avoided going to the Dr for 10 months (minus one visit to my old Dr, hey, I knew I could get the medicine I needed without going through all the shenanigans of a seeing a new Dr). But, the one good thing about Kaiser is immunizations are free. So I called....

I found out that I needed a typhoid fever shot and that I needed to renew my tetanus shot. So I set up an appointment for this past Thursday. When I was 10 or so, I had a tetanus shot, and my body was pissed at me for 4 days (103 fever, vomiting, diarrhea...it was not pretty). Well, let's just say my body is trying to take revenge like it did before. Both arms have been killing me, and I have had a fever since Thursday. Luckily, Tylenol helps me to break the fever, but it eventually comes back.

I am glad that it is only a fever that I am dealing with. But even at that, when you have a fever, your body shuts down. I have had a horrible headache on and off, and have been extremely tired. I am off to go to bed...since I have been sleeping about 11 hours the past couple nights, and I have to get up for work in the morning, I'm looking forward to getting 8 1/2 hours of sleep and am already planning a nap...