Tuesday, February 27, 2007

I'm Missing an Organ

It's official, I no longer have my gallbladder. I haven't had it for about a week. Surgery went well. The bonus is I am still alive, which I am particularly glad about. Although, there were times last week when I felt like death. My pain was so bad that they put me on the strongest pain medicine that can be distributed outside the hospital, percocet.
Now, what is interesting about percocet is that it takes away your pain, but not only does it take away your pain, you are also on a high. I have never been high, so this was a new feeling for me. I pretty much remember everything that happened the four days I was on it, the people, the conversations, what I watched on tv, but then I don't really remember it. That probably doesn't make sense to you, but it does to me. I was definitely on a trip. I had some really trippy dreams while I was on it too, one of them was particularly disturbing. Also, I wanted to scratch myslef, it felt like I was itchy, but then I wasn't...weird. Although it took away the pain, completely, unlike vicodine (which I took two of and wanted more after an hour), I don't know how I feel about taking percocet again. See, I can say that now that I am beginning to feel better, but I guess when it comes down to it, if I am in as much pain as I was last week, I probably would not hesitate to take it again if it was going to take care of the pain.
I am still in pain, but have decided to try to only take over the counter pain medication. And I am sick of being stuck at home, and you aren't suppose to drive if you are on vicodine and those sorts of medicines. I am not a very patient patient if you know what I mean. And, I am taking the GRE tomorrow, and it is kind of hard to study on pain medicines that make you feel a little off.
I have four holes in my stomach now. I am praying that the scars don't look too bad. It is really weird to think that this organ, that I never really cared about before I became sick, is no longer inside of me. I guess I will no longer be whole...

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