Sunday, December 16, 2007

A time of reflection

Every December, I have a is inevitable. And every December, I like to reflect on what has happened in my life in the past year. The highs and lows, the great and the horrible, all of these things have shaped me and define who I am to this day. I do not want to be like the Israelites who did not remember all that the Lord did for them. My life is drastically different than I thought it would be a year ago looking ahead. Here are some of the lessons/experiences that I have been through in my 23rd year here on earth...

-At this exact time last year, I had accepted a full time job at one of the premier lobbying firms in Washington DC after completing an internship there. My life today is vastly different than I thought it would be.

-I think I have the Jonah complex. Not because I am trying to avoid what God is asking me to do, but everytime that I try to move away, and move away permanently, God brings me back to Fresno through one circumstance or another. I have never purposefully disobeyed God in this, but have felt that He was giving me the choice...

-As a woman, I need to be grounded in theology. Theology is one of those words that usually scares people off, but theology is about a relationship with God...really knowing God. When hard times hit, and we are not sure why God is allowing certain things to happen, if we are not grounded in who Christ is, our whole belief system can be rocked.

-It is essential to ask God the tough draws us out of ourselves, beyond our circumstances and into serious dialogue with God.

-I am running the race that God has marked out for me.

-I once asked a friend if there can be two paths set out before me, and if she thought that I would end up in the same place no matter which one I chose. She didn't have an answer for me. But I now believe that no matter which path I choose, as I seek Him, He will keep on track. It may seem like I zigged when I should have zagged, but since God is sovereign, there is no missed opportunity. I have never missed an opportunity. I am in God's plan A for my life. There is no plan B if God is sovereign.

-I like to be in control, which means I very much dislike not being in control of certain situations...which happens often.

-I am constantly learning how to shed my own expectations.

-When you choose to enter into a relationship with somebody, you give up the right to not be hurt, as does the other person.

-I have an amazing family who loves me more than I realize sometimes. The older I get, the more I appreciate them. We constantly laugh when we are together. It is great when the four of us are able to be together, which doesn't happen a lot these days.

-My sister is becoming one of my best friends.

-Ending a relationship with somebody you really care about is extremely hard, even if it is for the right reasons.

-I still haven't figured out how my heart can be in three places at once...

-People in the United States are extremely ignorant to the injustice that occurs in the world.

-People enter into your life for only a season sometimes, and only God knows the reasons why.

-I eat vegetables now! For those of you that know me, I hated anything green until about April of 2007.

- I still feel so small when I sit out and look at the vastness of the ocean. I am reminded of how big the God I serve is.

-God is faithful.

The list could continue on, but I think this is good enough for now. It brings me joy and excitement to think off all that happened this past year and to look forward in anticipation of what God will allow me to be a part of and the circumstances I may encounter in the year to come. I think I need to take more time to reflect on the things that God has done in my life. It is good to remember.

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